Part II

The next special person in my life, who also happens to be one of the best mothers I know, is my very best friend, Angela. We first met 12 years ago during a brief attempt I took at operating a daycare out of my home. I figured it was a way to make a living while still being at home when my kids were young. Eventually the daycare fizzled out, but Ang and I remained close and very rapidly became best friends. She is the kind of person who is more than an acquaintance, she is more like the sister I never had. She is smart, beautiful, kind, honest, ambitious, and most of all, genuine. What you see is what you get. No fakery, no false pretences, no faux persona. She has been through struggles as we all have and has not only climbed the mountains of hardship, but overcome them, with grace, persistence and class.  And as a huge bonus... my own DNA relations consider her family....My own Mother considers her a daughter, as her mother does to me.. : }

She put herself through college while working a full time job and raising a daughter as a single parent. I will never forget the day she graduated and walked the aisle in her cap and gown. I was so proud to call her my “sister.” That very day I was so inspired by her achievement that I began seeking higher education for myself as well. I had long since put off any dreams of college when I had children but after walking along her path step by step, I started thinking hey, maybe I can do it, too. Soon after I enrolled and found myself returning to the virtual classroom; 24 months later, my own graduation.

Although my dear sis has moved a few states away to be closer to family, we stay in close contact and see each other at least once a year during our annual pilgrimage to sin city. I cannot imagine my life without her. Through marriage, divorce, births, deaths, child rearing, bad relationships, stressful jobs, good health and bad, we have made it together. She has been my rock, my confidante, my ally, my companion, my club hopping buddy, my mentor, my inspiration, and the one girlfriend I can trust to tell anything and know it will stay between us.

So on this Mother’s Day celebration, I wish Ms. GPT a wonderfully blessed day. I miss you and love you very dearly. I don't have a fairy God mother, I have a fairy Best-Sister-Friend.

Fondest memories:
Vegas trips, cross-country drives (18 wheeler explosions in Grand Junction), Super-bowl weekend, Hollywood (both the club and the city), Camels Breath, Backyard BBQs (don’t EVER pour beer on her chicken), Fully clothed pool jumps, ‘ol school concerts, South Mission Beach, Olive Wood Apts, Halloween parties, “The dress”, wedding preparations, Padre game tailgates, balloon chasing, holiday dinners, kickball, Marine Street beach, 94^th Aero Squadron, Fireworks, house painting, graduation parties, Crown Point bonfires, NYE Denver 2010 complete wiith -14 degree temps, hiking at Red Rock and Garden of the Gods…

Most memorable phrases:
“Charge him, girl!”
“It’s soooooo cute”
“N*%!a out”
“Am I good??? Am I good???”
“It’s not what people say, it’s what they do”
“Hellooooooo Ladies…”

　

Marvelous Moms, Part I

With May being the month to celebrate mothers, I am going to focus this weeks writing on the special women in my life who are all wonderful mothers. I have a grandmother, a Memere, Aunts, Godmothers, sisters, friends and of course, my own fabulous mama. I will start today off with a few of my girlfriends who happen to be mothers. Their names are Jerri, Jackie, Teri and Cassie. These are four phenomenal women.

Miss Jerri, as I call her, has raised two wonderful sons and has been a surrogate for two families who could not conceive. She gave them the gift of life, birthing a set of twins and a set of triplets. She is fun loving, kind, and dedicated to her sons and baby granddaughter. We met when our eldest sons were preparing for a college road trip sponsored by the school district. Our sons ended up being roommates on this trip. Much later we met again through a mutual friend we both knew, yet the connection had never been made. I remembered her from that meeting at the school and ever since then I have been blessed to have her as a great friend. I treasure all the shenanigans we find ourselves in and look forward to the great times still ahead.

Jackie, whom I lovingly refer to as Jackie Chan for no apparent reason, has three children, a daughter and two sons, all great young people, just like their mom. There is one word that I will always associate with Jackie and that is sweetheart. Through good times and bad she has been there for me. We have shared some great laughs when we worked together typically based on the tomfoolery our kids try to pull and the idiocy of the company. I miss the days our cubicles were across from each other and all the inside jokes we whispered to one another. Despite working for different companies now, we keep in close contact and spend time together whenever we can. One night in particular we went to a casino and she must have been my lucky charm because I won $300!!! I can always count on her to make me smile and have my back.

Teri is a mother of four I have known almost 20 years. When we met she had a son who was around 5 and a baby girl; my little boy was 2. We were neighbors and had a lot in common as our children are all biracial. For all intents and purposes, we were single mothers. We were young, naïve, and trying to balance motherhood while still enjoying our twenty-something years. It was remarkable that we were both pregnant at the same time with our now-15 year olds. Her son was born a week or two before my daughter. Soon after she relocated to Washington and we lost touch. There she was blessed with another daughter. Now she lives in a big, beautiful home with her kids and her own awesome mother (I love Miss Karen). She is a great mom to her kids; they are very close and share a warm family bond. I am quite thankful that we have reunited and I have been able to visit her and her groovy family circle.

Last but certainly not least there is Cassie, who has one extremely bright college aged son. We are only two months apart in age and have known each other since we were still in our mothers’ wombs. Although no actual blood relation, as children we called ourselves twin cousins because my mother (quite the seamstress) used to make us matching outfits. We went to the same preschool and elementary before, sadly, she moved away. We kept in sporadic contact over the years; some more than others, but in recent years have become close again. I have been able to not only visit with her, but also her mom and aunt who are equally as inspiring. I was thrilled to pieces when she moved back to San Diego. We have been able to spend a lot of time together in the last six months and we are now closer than we have ever been. I truly enjoy hanging out with her and not only reminiscing about the crazy stuff we did as teenagers, but creating new memories.

Thirsty Thursday

Being sans work this week, and weary from my unremitting search for a better employment; I opted to venture out into the real world and enjoy the camaraderie of other adults.  Avoiding further symptoms of cabin fever, I beautified myself a sufficient amount to be in public long and meandered into my favorite dive bar and frolic with the natives. I won’t state its name because, after all, this is my secret hideaway. It must be my lucky day because my favorite gal is tending the bar. There is nothing quite as uplifting as conversing with a person with a groovy persona. 


The jukebox is sporadically playing and each song is more random that the next.  Currently the television is tuned to a muted rerun of “Cops” and the woman sitting next to me is providing a scene by scene commentary which is quite humorous. This woman is advising the addict on the screen to use some “real tears” to get out of her arrest. “McCrackin” (this is honestly her name) is missing a few teeth and has clearly familiar with a pipe at some point in time.  Nevertheless, she is pure comic relief and comes across as quite the congenial character.


Suddenly I find myself distracted by a watermelon. One of the seasoned regulars has offered this fruit up to the bartendress in lieu of a cash gratuity. The dialogue was comical and went as follows: bartender: Aren’t my melons big enough? In which the patron replied “They are sweeter!” Ahhh good times. Just what the doctor ordered. 


Flash forward 30 minutes. As a gentleman orders a “White Stallion” which, incidentally, sounds great to me as well, a flood of sirens erupt outside. Ms. McCrackin (who also proclaims to have no “on” or “off” switch on her mouth) says “Oh no, they are after me! It’s not my fault the left the gate open.” As I chuckle at the sheer thought of her escaping the funny farm, she says “I can go from zero to 60 in three drinks.” I am just about to crack a sarcastic comment when The Beatles remind me to “Let it Be.” So that’s exactly what I did. Thanks, Mr. Lennon. 


A dialogue ensues when aforementioned White Stallion returns for a refill and gives me a history lesson. You see, my hand bag depicts a black and white photo of a Hollywood starlet (I haven’t a clue which one, but she resembles Anna Nicole Smith) and Mr. Stallion tells me she is a pin up model whose photo was originally painted on an aircraft during WWII. Incidentally, it was the first plane to drop a bomb on Hiroshima. One never knows when and where they will gain information. Until today I had no idea there were portraits on these planes. Go figure.


What a fabulous distraction this adventure has proven to be. I gather my belongings and bid adieu to these kindly folks who have provided me a great "alibi" for the day and greatly lifted my spirits. An old codger, who has been quietly propped up in his stool the entire time-fighting off sleep, also decides it is time for him to go. While he is assisted into his tricked out motorized cart, he promises to return after his afternoon nap to reap further havoc. Somehow, I believe him. Today I realized that there truly are bars where “everybody knows your name.”

*A special thanks to EM for making this day about 1000 times better

A Titanic Day

This afternoon I had the pleasure of attending the Titanic Exhibit in San Diego at the Natural History Museum in Balboa Park. What a special way for the family to spend time together! This was one of the most fascinating exhibtions I have attended and I have seen quite a few.  At the entrance of the walk-through exhibit, each person is given a "boarding pass" from an actual passenger listing demographical information, who they were traveling with and details on their journey. At the end of the tour, ticket holders search for their name on a wall to inquire if they perished or survived the catastrophe. In my case, my ticketed passenger survived. The following is some information I found on Mrs. Jennie Louise Hansen.

Mrs Claus Peter Hansen (Jennie Louise Howard) was born 20 December 1866 in Racine, Wisconsin, the daughter of William J. Howard and Edith Dawson. Jennie was a frail woman who had been poor in health for years. She had lived through several catastrophic events in addition to the Titanic.  She was a pastry cook in the Blake Opera House and Hotel which burned to the ground on 27 December 1884. She made the last trip in the elevator before flames gutted the shaft. Prior to the fire by several months, she was found lying unconscious in the kitchen overcome by gas fumes from the stove.

Jennie was married to Claus Peter Hansen on 25 July, 1900 in Racine. They would have no children.  In 1912 Peter and Jennie (then 45 years old) were going to Denmark to visit his family. Before leaving Racine, Jennie told her brother Thomas that she dreaded making the trip, saying that she had a feeling she would never return alive; she even told Thomas the type of funeral arrangements she wanted in the event that her body was recovered (he took this in a humorous vein). The Hansens left for Europe on board the Cunarder Campania on February 14, 1912.


When the time came for Peter and Jennie to return to America, Peter´s twenty-six year old brother Henrik Juul Hansen, decided to leave Denmark and accompany them to the new world. The trio boarded the Titanic in Southampton as third class passengers (ticket number 350026, £14 2s 2d). After the collision, Peter put his wife into a lifeboat (possibly lifeboat 11) with the words: "Jennie, you had better go so that there will be one of us to tell the story back home." Peter and Henrik both perished in the sinking. Jennie claimed that in the crowded lifeboat a sailor was sitting on her lap rowing the whole time!

As a result of the Titanic disaster, Jennie suffered such a shock to her nervous system that she was unable to shed a tear after. She also suffered from severe nightmares and went to stay with her elder brother Thomas and his wife Maggie in Franksville, Wisconsin. Apparently Jennie's nightmares were so severe that Thomas and Maggie had to go and hold her down on the bed.

Eventually, Jennie returned to Racine Wisconsin where she married Elmer Emerson, 19 years her junior, on 25 August 1915. They lived at 1214 Center Street, Racine. Jennie Louise Emerson (née Howard, late Hansen) died on 15 December 1952 aged 85, due to complications of chonic Bronchitis.

Career Corridors

Now that I have settled into the 2^nd phase of my adult life, I find myself seeking paths undiscovered thus far. I have come to the conclusion that I desire different things at 40 than I did at 20. Not so abnormal, right? Things that once ranked high in priority now barely scratch the surface of my psyche. I find myself on a perpetual ride to boredom, professionally speaking. I have worked basically in the same industry for 15 years, albeit under different titles. No matter what position I held, I always held on to my work ethic and went above and beyond what was expected. But I no longer have a passion for the health care industry, no longer look forward to going into work. Time for a fresh start.

I have a master plan and with any luck, I can set the wheels in motion in the very near future. I am setting my sights on a completely different genre of service this time around and I have a gut feeling I have found my true calling. I will have to get my knees dusty, starting at the bottom and I work my way up, but I welcome this challenge. I foresee great things in my near future. Life has no safety net, but I am excited to take this leap of faith.

pasos cortos, visión largo…..Short steps, long vision.

Injustice?

Recently many people celebrated the Easter holiday with friends and family. Typically there are traditional dishes, gathering around a table filled with appetizers, and some species of entertainment. For my family, this meant my Father’s delicious grilled filet mignon, my stepmother’s cream cheese and chutney dip, and golf. Well, the men gathered around the big screen and the females walked the property (several acres that what we fondly refer to as “Raymond Ranch.”)

Being animal lovers, their property has several lush turtle refuges, an impressive chicken coop, owl nesting boxes and a large aviary. In addition, there are fruit trees, trails, and view decks. So as the fellas watched golf, the ladies took a walk around the terrain looking at the new baby birds, picking fruit and collecting a colorful basket freshly laid eggs. The air was fresh and clean, being a good 30 minutes outside of the city proper and there is a certain peace in the atmosphere up there that calms even the most frazzled of nerves. For the most part, it was a lovely day.

Unfortunately this day was also a reminder of an injustice and a topic I find disturbing. I am sure there are people who will disagree with my opinion. Growing up in a law enforcement family, I could not count with all fingers and toes combined how many holidays we had faces missing around our supper table because someone had to work their regular shift at the jail or prison. I find it quite disheartening that convicted criminals are permitted family visits on legal holidays (even the banks and post offices are closed!!) causing sworn staff to miss the celebrations with their own loved ones. On this most recent holiday my stepfather, once again, had to work his normal shift at the jail, checking in guests, assigning visit rooms, and accepting money for the inmate accounts.

Please do not misunderstand… I know how beneficial a visit is to an incarcerated person. I know this because, as my regular readers are aware, I have a brother who is confined behind the walls of a California prison. After our father pays him a visit, his spirits are raised significantly and his letters are more positive and full of hope instead of despair. Said brother agrees with me regarding the frivolous visit schedule. I don’t begrudge a prisoner a chance to see their loved ones and keep the lines of communication open. Ultimately this type of bond to the outside world may help them upon release; closeness to friends and family may encourage them to live within the legal limits of the law.

I believe there is a fine line here. I reckon a law abiding, tax paying, hard working citizen deserves the holiday merriment with their kin considerably more than a convicted criminal.

Turn Out the Lights... The Party's Over

A weekend detached from reality seems to be just what the Doctor ordered. I am fighting the advent of middle age and sadly losing the battle. I find myself with those errant white hairs along the temple, sore, achy bones after a long day, and the need for more sleep. No longer can I go to nightclubs, party until daybreak, and still go to work by 9am. No sir, those days are gone. This being said, this past weekend was a milestone for yours truly. The BIG 4-0. I call it either the BIG 4-ohhhhhhhhh or the beginning of a new era... the Fuck It Forties.

Technically, the festivities started a week early with a trip to Sin City where I checked in to my room with a gift already waiting for me!!! My favorite alcohol, complete with sugar free mixer... and snacks for that dreaded morning after, all wrapped up in a cute pink bag! Finally the next night my favorite partner in crime arrived from Colorado. We shared a lot of laughs and caught up on all the latest news. I even got to play a new slot machine called "Breakfast at Tiffany's" and if you know anything about me at all, you will know anything to do with that movie, I'm all in. Unfortunately for my wallet, Ms. Hepburn, Paul and Cat weren't to generous.  On the 3rd night we attended a club, appropriately named "Gold Diggers" where the patio was tinctured with Mary Jane in the air and the dance floor was so small a chihuahua would feel cramped. Alas, still a great night. Gold Diggers, indeed. I don't think we paid for a single drink in that club. Ahhh the power of a skirt and heels... at any age.

The rest of the week flew by at warp speed and before I knew it, the official big day arrived. My cousin treated for a fabulous meal of surf 'n turf at Flemings Gaslamp. The next day was lunch with Mommy Dearest and kids at Centifonti's Italian Cocina. Later that evening, my comrades arrived from The City of Angels. Unfortunately, they brought along a refrigerator sized behemoth named Terrance, much like bringing a wild animal out of his habitat.... Sir Terrance is not the most socially graceful fella'. Still, another night of complementary drinks ensued. So many people came out to celebrate with me! I was truly touched and found myself tearing up a time or two seeing all these people who cared enough about lil' ol' me to want the charm of my company and give up a Saturday night. Oh what a night that was... one for the record books.

Sunday brought on yet another family gathering, this time over ribs, pizza, and a mixture of Cajun food at BJ's Steakhouse and Brewery. Story swapping and more catching up on the latest over delicious plates was an exceptional way to round out the weekend. I also received my very first Tiffany & Co piece of jewelry.  How thrilling it was to open that little blue box, beautifully wrapped with a white ribbon!!! Other fabulous prizes were gift cards to my favorite stores, books, French wall decals from my daughter and a gorgeous bouquet of long stemmed white roses from my son. Yes, my children know their mother well. Last but not least, the Dolce & Gabbana perfume I have been feening for since it was introduced. All things I would never have purchased for myself... But the absolute BEST gift of all was the presence of all those smiling faces and birthday hugs from the most important people in my life. I have said it before and I'll say it again... I am one blessed "young" lady.

Life's a Beach!

What a gorgeous day in SoCal! In the spirit of "striking while the WEATHER was hot", the offspring and I loaded towels, sunscreen and water, donned our bathing suits and headed west-bound on I-8, destination: Mission Beach.  How I missed the sound of the ocean waves and breeze on my skin! It was touching to see the young parents building sandcastles on the shoreline with their toddlers.... red pails, trowels, shovels, sifters.... it did my heart good to see such strong family units. Despite the crowds, this was a blissful way to close out the weekend!

"Stayin' Alive"

After seven long years of emptiness and one year of old fashioned written correspondence my dear friend and I have finally been reuinuted. Other than a few creases of age time stamped around the occipitals and perhaps a couple extra pounds around the waistline, Daniel looked exactly the same as he did in 1993 when our lives first crossed paths.

Over the many years of friendship we lived housemates several times, sometimes surviving of a $3.00 box of pancake mix until payday. It would be impossible to count all the time spent shooting pool and playing music on the juke box at the local dive or re-watching our favorite movies. So many inside jokes and quoting movie lines at moments only the two of us would get the irony, and this was only the beginning of our friendship. By far my fondest memory is Daniel being the only person in my corner at a very stressful time of my life. I had just given birth to my 2nd child and was in the midst of divorce preceedings, basically living with no support. I was forced to return to work when my daughter was only three weeks old, and to make it worse, I worked graveyard shift.  I was overcome with guilt leaving my newborn and my 4 year old, but he was right there by my side, someone I trusted my childrens' lives with. He watched over them as though they were his own flesh and blood. He kept them safe and cared for and entertained them so I could sleep after working all night. He never asked for anything in return except my continued friendship. Daniel was an integral part of my children's lives.

So here we are, almost 20 years later and so much to catch up on. We are both facing obstacles in our own lives but somehow knowing my dear friend is back in my life, I feel a sense of peace.  We have been there for one another through so many hardships, I know that the challenges that face us now we can get through. Another example of God working in mysterious ways.

Thanks, Ott.

Needing a little time to recharge my batteries, I checked into a hotel for 2 days recently. How lovely it was to watch the sun go down over the Pacific from my 12th floor balcony. I slept in enjoying a bed full of pillows and had a leisurely breakfast of toast, coffee and fruit while making new friends. Afternoon was comprised of a good book, fashion rags, hot tub, and a few cocktails poolside. Evening delivered a devastatingly handsome man over for dinner and a few more cocktails in the lobby lounge, which sparked up quite the flirtatious conversation. Oh my... how a sexy smile can bring the school girl giggle out.

Wash, rinse, repeat... day two brought on much of the same except that I managed to squeeze in a bit of retail therapy for my upcoming annual Vegas extravaganza. All in all, a much needed break from reality.

Breakfast At Tiffany's

At long last, I finally viewed Breakfast at Tiffany's on the big screen. What a treat for yours truly, who adores Ms Hepburn. Not only for her acting talent, but more so for her humanitarianism. A woman that epitomizes class, intellect, humor, strength, style, and selflessness. I wish I could have met her just once to tell her how much I admire her.   Now I'll go to bed, dreaming of a time when ladies enjoyed hats and gloves and men opened doors and held hands. Scratch one off my bucket list, this dream has been fulfilled.

Pickin' Season

Thursday text from daughter:

A: MOM!! Guess what my GPA is?!?
ME: Ummm it must be great if you are so excited...
A: a 4.7!!!
ME: Makin your mama proud, kiddo

Looking back, in my high school years, I was a lousy student. My parents didn't care about grades or homework, as long as I graduated and moved out. Sounds cruel, but this was my reality. So I skated by doing the bare minimum. I ditched all the time (typically to go to work) I partied in Tijuana every chance I got (back then it was not as deadly as it is now) and hung out with my much-older college-age cousin (she was a "good Catholic girl" whom they trusted) which ultimately lead to me trying to be more grown up than I was ready to be. At 18 I was on my own. I attempted community college because it seemed like the next logical step. But in the 1st semester I got pregnant and that was the end of higher education for the next 20 years. At least I finally got that degree. In the meantime, seeing how both my children excel in their education, are both innately driven to do their best and still maintain active social lives and honorable hobbies... makes me wonder what I might have accomplished in life, had my own parents carried higher expectations. No regrets here because I am basically a happy person with life. I suppose my apples have fallen FAR from their tree, and rolled into a whole different orchard. It does my heart good to get these type of messages... makes me feel like somewhere along the line, I did something right. : )

Workin' Gal

Today was a beautiful day in San Diego. I woke up with a smile on my face and a dog at my feet. Two hours later I was sitting in a refresher course training session as a rehire at my old company.  I am hoping and praying that this opportunity turns into a long term commitment. They have expressed huge trust in my capabilities by assigning me to a dual position that promises to increase my experience.

So, in closing early and getting a good night's sleep.... I leave you with this fabulous quote I heard today... Live a life youre proud of and if you need to, have the strength to start all over again.


Behind Door # 2

In the spirit of dancing to the beat of my own drummer... I am opening a bottle of Moscatto and settling in for a Sex and the City Marathon in lieu of beer and football... Somehow I feel like I found my own Superbowl. And Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Samantha are playing at my half time show.

Think Pink!

What a great few days it has been for yours truly. I received a smidgen of Intel on a job lead and within 3 days I had signed on the dotted line, Monday I attend a training refresher course and begin work thereafter. Welcome back to the wonderful world of medical records!

With financial stability, my mind was at ease and I spent time with my "twin cousin" today (A long, but rather cute story, stemming from childhood.) We shared lunch and sangria of fish bowl proportion and later met downtown to watch a classic movie on the big screen. I adore Ms. Hepburn but had yet to see Funny Face. Although a movie with "pizazz," I still hold Breakfast at Tiffany's in my #1 spot. A fun filled evening, nonetheless. A brisk walk through a gorgeous February evening and time with said cousin and my favorite daughter. All in all, a blessed day.