The countdown has begun... In 48 hours I will be landing in Sin City, enjoying a birthday dinner with family and friends, and (hopefully) getting a temporary reprieve from life... so bartender.... please remember it's shaken, never stirred, and keep 'em coming.
Only these lyrics can really summarize how I have been feeling the past few days. Sometimes the hurt in one's heart is so heavy that they cannot find the words to express it from their own mind, rather, find comfort in a song For me, this is today. I pray for some peace of mind.
The last few days have been pretty darned spectacular, despite the missing presence of earned income. My partner in crime has returned home and thus the smile has come back on my face. The last several days brought on a quick road trip, thrifting, cocktails on the beach, classic movies, sushi, dress/shoe shopping, and finally, today, a long, overdue hike. Living in Southern California, we often take for granted how close we are to some of the most beautiful trails at our fingertips. Since my body is sorely screaming at me from my nose to my toes, AND the rattlesnake I stumbled upon during today's hike is still slithering about in my subconscious, I shall keep tonight's post brief. And to the Gods of Dreamland, please keep any and all venomous creatures out of my nocturnal illusions.
Dear Las Vegas,I am greatly anticipating an extended girls’ weekend with my two closest female companions. In a few days I will throw some rags of tulle and ribbon, artificial eyelashes, and 4 inch leg extenders into a suitcase and board a 747 with hopes of a severe case of temporary amnesia on my real life. Put your arms around me, Sin City, and shower me with a cascade of laughs, cocktails, female bonding, and a few cute, chivalrous boys wouldn’t hurt things. Grant me a decent sense of ocular judgment during my trollops and for the love of Pete (or John, Mike or even a Tyrone) yield large amounts of testicular fortitude to prolong the euphoria. Book smarts can be overlooked if the outer package is impeccable, but BOTH qualities are preferred.
Allow me to don my most favorite party dresses and come-hither heels, and paint the town a deeper red than my favorite pair of Carlos Santana’s. Keep the men with arrogant/swollen egos, empty pockets, truth allergies, unibrows, AARP membership cards, hostilities, small.. (ahem… insert throat clearing) “packages” and, lastly, funky breath, at a safe orbital distance. This trip has been calibrated for months and to come home disappointed would be a crime in itself. The three of us felines are in dire need to lose ourselves in an out of body experience; let our hair down, throw caution to the wind and recharge our proverbial batteries.
Please do not let this house of cards, dice, slots, and jackpots fall into an abyss of monotony. Thank you for your kind consideration.
Yours very truly,
The Birthday Girl
He will be self confident, take pride in his appearance and comfortable in his own skin, regardless of imperfections that everyone has. He owns at least one suit and wears it well. A man’s man. A protector for those he loves. Innately polite. Knows to look one in the eye when speaking, offers a firm handshake and is ok with giving a manly hug to another male.
A bit old fashioned. Has no aversion to an occasional hand holding, opens doors and greets his elders with a “sir” or “ma’am.” He is socially comfortable and at ease when meeting others. A friendly smile, head nod or gesture of greeting in passing simply because it is a nice thing to do.
Has a sense of purpose in life, more than the expensive vehicle, big house or latest gadget. While he can appreciate these things, he does not require the ownership of said items to find happiness. He lives within his means and is comfortable and honest about what he can or cannot provide.
He is a part of something bigger than himself. He will have concern for others, the well being of society at large and is compassionate towards others. The type of person who will see a homeless person outside an eating establishment and purchase extra items for them, without judgment or expectation, give it to said person on his exit simply out of the goodness of his heart.
Has a job but knows how and when to hustle if the situation requires this drastic of a measure. He has my back and trusts that I have his. He knows difference between kindness and weakness and does not take advantage of either. He pays attention to detail even when I don’t think he has noticed the small things. He appreciates it when I do the same in return.
He is nonjudgmental, confident in his beliefs, yet open minded to new ideals. When we do not see things the same way, we are able to agree to disagree and compromise, then move on without drama or raised voices. He listens when I need to relieve my heart of hurt and knows I will reciprocate in kind. He trusts me enough to confide in me and knows to keep my private and most intimate concerns between us and not broadcast our relationship details to the world.
He overlooks my minor imperfections, does not take my non-relationship irritations personal and knows when I need a moment alone to gather my thoughts. He allows me to pamper him without the nagging thought in the back of his mind of “what does she want?” because he understands this is just my way of showing affection.
He not only makes me laugh, but, the very thought of him makes me smile. He is flexible. If it is a girls night out, he does not blow up my phone or assume I am up to no good. He understands that I am outgoing, friendly, and a bit of a flirt by nature but I would never cross the line of disrespect towards him because he knows I am a good woman knows her boundaries. Along the same line, if he desires a guys night out, I can trust that he will have a great time and come home to me without any underhanded, shady, or disrespect towards the relationship we have built.
He equally appreciates a quiet evening at home with a dinner and movie as much as he does an occasional club. He does not dread the occasional obligatory family gathering on either side of our families.
I wonder if this man, or anything even close to this, still exists? I must have a faith that somewhere, somehow, sometime, this person’s path will cross mine. Perhaps I am just a hopeless romantic.
There is a value in bearing witness to what's happening to people who are living their lives with extraordinary tenacity and great dignity, despite doing so in the face of horror. We live each day here in the United States, going about our daily routines, casually bypassing the destitute, the homeless, addicted and underprivileged. We spend frivolously on $4.00 coffee, expensive vehicles, grossly ornate homes, and lavish vacations. We are perversely attuned to our own selfish desires, taking for granted the lifestyles we lead. We pass this sense of entitlement on to our offspring who then grow up not knowing the value to earning their own way and regard material items as a symbol of success. We do this without realizing the consequential aftermath that will result or without giving thanks to God and giving back to the world in gratitude for our blessings.
I am just as guilty of the next person for this frivolous behavior. I trust in my inner moral code, upbringing, and faith that people are innately kind, despite being sidetracked with personal ambition. We all must remember to thank those who protect the very freedoms we believe are entitled to us a God given right. Recently I saw a truck on the highway with art in the rear window that summed this up. “Home of the free, BECAUSE of the brave.” My sentiments exactly, even if I have to be reminded from time to time.
