Tough Decisions

The first thing this morning I received a telephone call from a gentleman conducting a government background check on my ex husband. He called from a local number and stated my former betroved is currently under review for an opportunity here in San Diego. I am torn. My initial instinct tells me the right thing to do is to return this man's message and be forthright in any way I can.  I don't think I can say anything that would hurt his chances at a job, as our issues were marital, not work related.  On the flip side, my inner bitch says "screw him" and why do anything that will make his life easier after all he put me through?

The basic background of our marriage... we were married only six months when he received military orders to return to Virginia, orders which he was previously aware were coming, yet never disclosed to me prior to marriage. On our one year wedding anniversary we relocated to the east, uprooting my children from the only home they had ever known and leaving an amazing job in the name of being a supportive and loving wife. Upon arrival things were copacetic for six months. We began arguing over money and parenting, causing discomfort in the home and with my children. There are many other things I could add, but I won't air all the dirty laundry and slander his name.

He decided divorce was the best option and found it ok to inform me of this on my 34th birthday, at a restaurant, in front of my children. REALLY??? Due to Virginia being a Commonwealth state the process took over two years before completion. TWO YEARS!!! This was a case with no mutual children, property, or support requested and should have taken six months. I incurred further expense in the returning move to California. Finally it appeared to be official when I realized Virginia law allowed him to contest the reinstatement of my maiden name, which he did. I had to hire legal counsel and file a whole new case, incurring travel costs and attend several different hearings in Virginia. The ex did this purely for spite. It was financially costly, but more importantly, hurtful, after all, it was only 18 months prior we made our vows. Although the marriage did not work out, there was still a lot of raw emotion involved and to this day I hesitate to have any type of long term relationship because I don't trust whole heartedly, as I once did. He took that from me.  

Back to my phone call this morning... part of me feels the right thing to do is to return the call and be the bigger person. The other part of me feels as though I closed the book on this past life and to any connection to him six years ago. I do not want anything to do with him, his life, or his career. I am really on the fence and quite confused. Any advice???