Mi Vida Loca

The last three days I have donned my thinking cap by 8 am and thrown myself into the abyss of “Successful Interviewing in Human Services” otherwise known as the class I am currently taking online. Although a demanding class, in two weeks I have had my eyes opened to so many new factors and elements involved with interviewing. I actually think a lot of these strategies will apply to interviewing for a better job, which is next on my agenda. The melee in the “corporate office” (I use this term extremely loosely) seems to never end. No one seems to know what the person next to them is doing and I don’t think I can take much more idiocy thrown into my daily agenda. Insert the coined phrase “The lunatics run the asylum” here.

Back to original thought… I have completed a weeks worth of assignments in 3 days so that I can thoroughly enjoy the first trip of 2010. In T minus two days I will manumit myself and throw the duffel bag back in the car, heading north on I-15. Next stop, Sin City! I shall leave my perennial choir girl robe in the closet (uuuh, do I really have these?) and pull out the mini skirt, boobage revealing blouse and obligatory stilettos. This being said, I made a New Years Resolution to dress more age appropriate, however, this IS Las Vegas, I will be AWAY from the impressionable offspring. Nothing short of the occasional rabid bridezilla or drunken clochard will bring down my high spirits. It also helps to have a fabulous co-pilot and partner in crime. I affectionately refer to her as my Lady Bug.

So, as I close the laptop, pack the suitcase and start preparations, wish me luck. Hopefully I will come home with more than the conciliatory digital photos and a wallet of nothing but regret.

10 DAYS AND COUNTING......

Listen to the Rhythm of the Falling Rain...

Wow, so 2010 has brought a very busy schedule to yours truly. Without prattling on forever about mundane things, suffice it to say, work has been busy, class has restarted and the offspring have been keeping my emotions all over the map. The son has been a burr under my saddle in particular. I wish he would realize that he does not have enough ass in his britches to carry on the way he does. I guess once a young man gets a feather in his cap from that special first love, he decides he is grown. I digress.... In other news, the daughter has discovered a newfound attraction for writing and has spun a few tales Hollywood would be proud of. Perhaps someday she will be an author. As for me, well, the only reading I have time for is textbooks, writing is found in the form of this blog and papers, and downtime has been spent with friends and family. And now.... back to the textbooks.... and listening to the torrential downpour outside my window.

I bid adiou to 2009

The sun has set on 2009 and in 30 days my life may be different. Maybe for the better, maybe not. I have to put my trust in God that He is leading me down the right path during my journey. Amazing how 24 hours can change ones general plan, priorities, opinion and prayers.

In this era of friends regarded as fast food, people who are insincere, selfish and feel entitled, I consider myself a blessed woman to have a handful of friends who are true, lifelong, proven relationships. These are people who love me, take me as I am flaws and all. People who do not judge, rather point out both positives AND negatives and allow me to make decisions without fear of recourse. These are people who not only protect me but also my children. God help the person trying to harm any of our group of offspring because there would be a mad mob of vigilantes seeking our own type of justice.

My other blessing is family. Without them I would have a much different history and a much tougher life. They have guided me with their wisdom and taught me positive morals in life. Honesty, respect, ethical work habits, pride and determination to name a few.

The two groups overlap in many ways, family relations are also friends and friends are considered family minus the DNA match. I love you all dearly and wish the new decade to be filled with good health, loving relationships, and uninteruped prosperity!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Hello all, I wish you a fabulous 2010 and welcome you to a new decade. May it be filled with love, life, and laughter.

There is a 3rd turn on this street, it's called school! Yesterday was officially the last day for 2 blessed weeks. Now if I can just get through 8 hours of work tomorrow, I will be able to relax the rest of the holiday. No big plans other than visiting family and friends on a leisurely schedule. No hectic itinerary this year. By 7 pm tomorrow I will be sitting in front of another roaring fire, glass of red and some good company. Nice. Same serenity I had tonight, minus the red. All in good time..... SO to all of you, have a wonderful, blessed and safe holiday, and remember the reason for the season.

Congrats!!!

Local girl done good. Although I do not claim to know Mrs. Baskett aka Kendra, she is a local chic from Clairemont who keeps it real and is such a spunky little thing. I just love her to pieces and could not be happier for her and the hubbie on their newborn baby boy, a true blessing and bundle of joy. May they be all healthy, happy and loved. P.S. what a hottie she hooked. Hey, Kendra is no average "Girl next door" but lawd hab'mercy the Hankster is a fine specimen. Aye Dios Mio!

Still Dancing

Wow, what a random week. I will assume the big guy upstairs had a master plan for me and that is why he kept me home all week from work. The rain has been scattered the last few days until yesterday afternoon when a flight out of my typical realm lead me to hit up the Casino all by my lonesome for a play date with my favorite Indians.

What an odd day it turned out to be. I must have stepped out of myself and donned another personality for all the mischief I got into. By 1 p.m. I was sitting in front of a penny slot machine called "Go Ape", mimosa in one hand, cigar in the other. The elderly gentleman next to me was checking me out and not even trying to disguise his wandering eyes. I have to admit I got a tickle out of this. My ripped jeans, wrap blouse and heels had this guy drooling. He sparked conversation and when I began a winning streak, put a $20 in my slot, no pun intended. That $20 turned into almost $80 and when I cashed out (I know when to stop people)he asked me to join him for lunch at the fabulous buffet there, which I politely accepted. Who would have thought the day that started with champagne by 1 would end up with a suga' daddy by 3? And please believe... I have his number safely tucked into my cell phone. 'Ol Arthur just may be a good guy to have in my corner in this economy.

The rain must have been brewing during my masquerade, as I stepped out gripping my winnings into a torrential downpour, with no bumbershoot. Oh well... at least I didn't scrape my knee or break a heel in my frantic walk to the back 40 where my chariot awaited. As I depart the casino dripping wet, I get a call from an old flame inviting me for an afternoon visit. Feeling frisky, I stopped by on my way home and well.. let's say, made him a happy man.

By 5 p.m. I had a steaming hot shower and was burrowed in flannel sheets and a down comforter in my own bed. The funny thing.. no one in my house was none the wiser. Ahh how I cherish my freaky tales, especially when I am the only person who has the whole script. I truly did Go Ape today

Rain Dance

Some may disagree with me, but today is a beautiful day in San Diego. I have to admit, it started off rather irritating as I drove almost two hours in pouring rain to the other side of town, only to be turned away at the office I was scheduled at to work. I suppose I could have been really pissed off all day but...... trying to find my silver lining, I used the morning for a breakfast date with a friend, some holiday shopping and homework is next. This day also has allowed me to be a good mummy and get my daughter after school so she is spared the walk home and possible winter cold that may result. OK, so it is not quite winter yet but why split hairs? I found some photo's from the morning news to share. A day in Southern California with pouring rain results in idiots who drive reckless, people always trying to cross the San Diego River thinking their car will somehow make it, and the general flooding in Mission Beach. Get out the sandbags, San Diegan's, it's gonna be a wild ride.

Life, Laugh, Love

What a week indeed. Lots of ups and downs and several u-turns, but all things considered, I am still blessed individual. Now that school is in full swing and the wrinkles have been ironed out on the job front, things seem to be running smooth. The "live" part is full of paperwork, assignments and holiday shopping. "Laugh" consists of the oddities of people around me and the childish actions of adults who should be much more mature by this stage of life. I can only giggle at it and take pride in being above it. The "love" is the biggest and best part of my life and can be summed up in three words. Friends and Family. Without the presence of my children, parents and friends, I would not be the person I am. You all bring the best out of me and that is no easy task, I assure you.

Melancholy

Feeling very lonely today despite being around people. My closest friends are either distant or some distance away. No special someone to lay next to. I say often how I am happily single but I am human and sometimes I get weepy too. My clost friendship is so strained right now. Although no bad words have been said, we are both remaning distant. Without valid explanation. I miss telling her things and hearing her voice.

I miss a man of equity calling me every so often. Miss the little things such as blockbuster nights, coffee houses or that kind of closeness felt even when no words are spoken. I feel like I am alone in my own little world. But how does one feel alone even surrounded by people?

Tonight I cry silently so the others don't hear. Don't want to lay my burdens on anyone. I crave sleep to find me and to do it fast but it doesn't. The sandman passes me by waving to me. I am wide awake with my thoughts how easy it is to remember good times with past relationships and block out the bad. Remembering the inside jokes and little games we would play. Trying to block the arguing, tears and anger. The after effect of weeping for something that could have been beautiful.

But life moves on, numbness ensues and memories of feelings fade. Until a night like tonight.. silence surrounds me, save for an occaional rustle of trees. Darkness stealthily creeps in. Then I hear the soft sound of a snoring dog at my feet and a daughter sleeping, burrowed down next to me mumbling in her sleep. She misses time with her mama so she asks if she can at least sleep next to me. Ah the light beginning to reappear. Wrong again. It is simply daybreak. Another sleepless night.

Old School

When exactly did people become so reliant on electronic media to remain in contact? What happened to picking up a telephone (yes! once people actually HAD these in their homes, connected to a wall outlet and everything!)and phoning someone for a chat? When was the last time you came home from work and played your answering machine and hoped there was at least one personal message from a live voice calling to say hello? I think my answering machine is having an affair with the computer generated voice who calls everyday from the Union Tribune trying to sell me subscriptions.

I have to admit that I sometimes call someone hoping they are not home so I can simply leave a quick message with the pertinent information and hang up without a long discussion. Seriously, after a 9 hour day at work I am just not up to hearing about your ingrown toenail or what the neighbors-sister's-friends-cousin in law got arrested for. Come to think of it, these are things I would rather not hear about at all.

Voice mail and text messaging has become the ruler of the new milineum, folks. For parenting sake, text is a great tool for the kids to check in when mama bear is at work and cannot answer her phone. Or to send a loved one a quick "Hello, thinking of you." But relying on this medium for all contact? And please do not even get me started on the lack of mail correspondence with actual handwritten words on stationary.

I have revolted against the full throttle texting where entire conversations take place. SO much is lost in translation. A person's inflection cannot be heard and there are only so many emoticons you can add with a keyboard. From this day forward I have made a vow to use text as a simple tool and nothing more. When I wish to SPEAK to a friend or a member of my family, I will do the old fashioned thing... maybe even from my land line.

Happy Thanksgiving Ya'll

25 Random Things About Me...

1. For an odd reason I sometimes have brown roots!! Strange!!
2. I love to laugh - it's great therapy - and God knows I need LOTS of therapy!
3. I love the beauty of the beach, mountains and desert.
4. I am a Denver Bronco fan.
5. I have two teenage kids that actually get along - so rare but sooo awesome!
6. I have been a single mom for 17 years.
7. My biggest fear is dying alone. And going back to jail.
8. My favorite colors are pink, brown, green and blue.
9. I completed my AA in Human Services in May 2009, now back for my BA.
10. I love the rain - unless I have to drive in it.
11. I enjoy random conversations with strangers. You would be amazed what you can learn by opening your eyes ears and shutting your mouth.
12. I was born in San Diego and lived here my whole life, minus a 12 month stint in Virgina Beach.
13. I hate bridges, thieves, humidity, liars, creamed corn, war and fakes. No particular order.
14. I love the innocence and soft scent of a baby.
15. I have no serious regrets, without failures there would be no lesson learned.
16. I would give my last dollar to anyone of my close friends or family with no questions asked.
17. I believe everything happens for a reason.
18. I would love to travel the world - I love to travel anywhere!!
19. I love music - I can appreciate the art in it even if the final product is not to my particular taste.
20. I love to watch classic movies.
21. My biggest joys in life - DiAndre and Aliza.
22. My favorite food - Mexican, Italian, Vietnamese.
23. I love to sing - I'm not sure if anyone else likes it, but thats ok.
24. I Love to sew, stitch, write and ride my beach cruiser, amongst other things.
25. My favorite sayings are:

"For beautiful eyes, look for the goodness in others. For beautiful lips, only speak words of kindness. And for poise, always walk with the knowledge that you are never alone." ~Audrey Hepburn

"If you haven't cried, your eyes can't be beautiful. ~Sophia Loren

Another One Bites the Dust

OK so I wasn't exactly married or in a committed relationship, nevertheless, after a 180 pound burden was lifted off my shoulders today, I sure feel like a million smackers. An incongruous and insipid liason to say the least. I said it before, and I'll say it again... I require a relationship with equity and frankly, this one never had it from jump street. I accept my faults in this as learning experiences and file them away under the heading of "What, for the love of all that's holy, was I thinking?" If I wanted to cater I'd learn to cook and I damn sure can't gratify someone else's fragile ego. In a long line of life's priorities, a serious commitment, no matter how beautifully schematized, is just not in the cards (NOT that this ever came close to that category.)

So for the time being I will seek cuddles and warmth from my offspring, spiritual contentment from personal faith, intellectual stimulation while fulfilling my educational goals and companionship from friendships, tried and true. (And my dog)

On that note... WHERE MY BIATCHES AT????

Thank you, Ms. Hepburn

Well I got the pedicure/foot massage, watched forensic files, took the bubble bath, snuggled with the pupp and lots of studying done. Never quite got to my book, but I think it will have to stay on the back burner until I am done with this class. Que sera sera. Friday was a nice relaxing evening at home, snuggling with the daughter and watching an Audrey Hepburn marathon, our favorite classic movie actress. Saturday was filled with studying and homework followed by a lovely afternoon nap. Glory be to God. Today however, my bubble was busted thanks to the Broncos playing like crapola and the Bolts playing like it was the super bowl. I remain a class act though, and congratulated the SD fans on their win. Uuugh, I think I need a hug. Now, I write a letter to the broham, drink some pear tea and get ready for 60 minutes. Another week of chaos will soon ensue...